trevordayschool

In order to develop mutual respect and understanding, we needed to establish ongoing, regular communication among parent, student, and teacher that allowed for constructive and supportive discussions and opportunities for problem-solving. e triangle of the parent, teacher, and student is an ongoing relationship that spans many years; it grows and changes along with the student. During their first years of school, parents are intensively involved in every aspect of their child's school life—necessitating frequent, informal conversations with the teacher. As the student gets older and more self- sufficient, the parent recedes somewhat and conferences become important "tent poles" to maintain connections to teachers and fill in blanks about the child's school life. By high school, students are independently navigating their relationships with teachers, and the conference is an opportunity to bring parents back into the fold. THE FOUNDATION With the leadership of Dr. Howard Weiss of the Ackerman Institute for Family erapy, e Day School made this innovative, somewhat controversial change in 1985. Training for the faculty and administration included learning the protocol and role playing. By the time teachers and families had completed their first set of conferences, everyone was "sold." It was instantly clear that our remodeled family conference was highly mission-consistent. THE MISSION Trevor's mission for students has always been that they learn to truly know themselves. We have always guided them to take responsibility for their learning and to become increasingly self-aware of their strengths, passions, and goals. In 1985, we finally asked this all-important question: "How can students develop this self-knowledge if they don't attend a conference in which their accomplishments, challenges, and goals are discussed?" Student participation in their conference allows them to develop critically impor- tant skills: self-assessment, reflection, personal goal-setting, problem-solving, and self-awareness in relationship to classmates and teachers. ey experi- ence the interest and support of their parents and teachers, so vital to healthy development. And in listening to others' perspectives and perceptions, students become more adept at describing their own learning. In turn, they become better self-advocates. THE ARCHITECTURE A successful conference requires careful preparation. Parents are urged to share with the teacher any questions, concerns, and proposed discussion items in advance of the meeting. With this information in hand, the teacher can research questions and synthesize the parental perspective into the preconference planning. Bearing in mind the student's grade level, the teacher/advisor reviews and reflects on the student's work and consults other educators who work with the child. With this combined information they discover themes or patterns that can lead to developing goals. For example: A student may be doing well in many subjects, but an English teacher cites that assignments are rarely completed on time. e goal may be to develop a method for the student to deliver English assignments when due, without compromising work quality in other subjects. e student is also asked to reflect upon the current semester and overall school experience in advance of the conference. is can be done in writing through a questionnaire or in discussion with the teacher. Such self-analysis and reflection is essential to the student's investment in the process and his/her development of self-advocacy skills. While academics are usually the primary focus, a student's social and emotional growth are also considered. Is the student making friends? Does she/ he feel comfortable asking questions? Is her or his behavior enhancing or impeding their progress? e teacher and student review academic performance, class participation, and work product, considering different subject areas and looking for themes and patterns. For the youngest students this is straightforward. Discussion might include questions such as which parts of the day do they like and dislike? What are they finding hard or easy? With [student] participation the conference could become an influential tool to celebrate the student's work, reflect on progress and challenges, look for themes from which impor- tant goals emerge, and develop a mutually agreed upon plan to realize these goals. 2 0 T R E V O R D AY S C H O O L n S U M M E R 2 0 1 5 – 2 0 1 6

• Cover